little miss reverse

A journey from ME/CFS to health using Reverse Therapy and Lightning Process

Thursday, December 28, 2006


Just got back from 2 weeks in India. Had a fantastic time. Coped fine with the long flights, the heat and felt like a normal human being again. Think I really needed a holiday to break the downward spiral I was in.

After the holiday, living with my BF feels really normal now and the stress I was experiencing around that seems to have vanished. I'm feeling very stable and happy in my home now and my cats are well happy too.

I'm feeling pretty chilled again and ready to start the new year in my new job(well... old job, increased hours). I'm looking forward to doing my Lighning Process Training on the 9th January. Hopefully after that, will no longer be thinking like an ill person in a well persons body and can just get on with being a well person.

I'm thinking that if I get what I'm expecting out of LP, I will end this blog and stop using the forums that have been a great support to me whilst I have been ill. I know that I will experience more blips along the way, but as long as LP gives me better tools for dealing with stress, I think I will consider myself completely recovered.

I know I'm jumping the gun a bit, but hell, I was the same about RT and that worked for me too. Can't see any reason why this isn't my last hurdle before I reach the finish line.

I'll obviously post on here my experiences of LP, but hope to be off just living my life, free from this post-ME anxiety and fear VERY soon.

Sunday, December 03, 2006

things are finally settling down

I have NEVER in my life experienced such a traumatic move. I struggled with it before I moved with all the planning and the fear, then I found the physical side of moving quite tough and pulled the muscles in my back and after the move I found the emotional side of moving in with my boyfriend quite challenging.

I can remember back at the beginning of September I started to wobble and it has continued in one way or another up until this week. Last week I had a horrendous day and thought I'd had a relapse but it turned out it was my period and PMS exagerating all of my anxieties and draining all my energy. I arranged to work from home for the next week as I had felt so crap. On Tuesday I had some injections as I am going to India in a week, then something really interesting happened...on Wednesday I felt the best I had in ages. I think I've been carrying so much stress and anxiety (even about going on holiday and injections) that I haven't felt 'normal' for months.

I'm finally feeling good again after 3 months of turmoil. I haven't had a relapse, I just freaked myself out. It's been incredibly hard and I really thought I'd blown it last week. My biggest barrier to my health is my anxiety and the chemical memories that relate to past upsets. I can't wait to learn LP so I can put this all to bed.

Like I said, I'm off to India on Saturday and I know that I will be able to enjoy it now. It's going to be a really significant thing for me because my ill health started after I returned from a trip to India 5 years ago. It feels really good to be doing it and almost like I can pick up where I left off last time, but this time take a different route.

I feel like I've finally arrived at a point where I can just enjoy my new home and enjoy living with my partner and stop being so stressed. Phew!